Last night I dreamt the strangest of dreams... My tongue rolled back and chocked my throat, my upper teeth fell out of my mouth and no matter how hard I tried they just wouldn’t stick on the jaw again... I held them in my hand making a mental note of visiting the dentist at day break but admitting that all was lost forever... Horrified, I turned sides in my sleep only to face a monster bug with thorns sticking out ready to plunge into my ear and accidentally touching it, causing immense pain in my fingers... realising that it was only a dream, I tried hard enough to open my eyes but in spite of the struggle I couldn’t do it. That is all that I remember of the surreal night... the fear along with disbelief, the sense of loss in spite of hope, and dilemma that brought to surface the lyrics of a Green Day song...
Another turning point; a fork stuck in the road.
Time grabs you by the wrist; directs you where to go.
So make the best of this test and don't ask why.
It's not a question but a lesson learned in time.
vis-à-vis
(Down memory lane 27 July 2005...)last night i killed myself....
and wept with tears of blood...
the passive longing of my nights turned into a death-wish
and drowned all my dreams in it.
i used to indulge in sleep-walking
today i have no feet to support me
i used to look up at the sun and mock its loneliness
today i do not exist!
there was a fire
which casted me in this mould
there was a shadow
which gave faith to my soul
but last night i killed myself...
and wept with tears of blood
because my "i" lost its essence
because there is no "i" anymore.
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